Sandra Robinson
Late in the fall of 2002, I had my yearly mammogram. A few days
later I received a call from my OB-GYN that there was an area of
great concern in my left breast and that I needed to see a
specialist as soon as possible. Because I had been through two
surgical biopsies on my right breast (which were benign), I made an
appointment with the same surgeon to view my films and advise me on
any necessary procedures. As I sat on the examining table, she
outlined the mass in my left breast with her finger and said, “This
is cancer!”
It was a very strange experience. I began crying in my physical
body on the examination table, but I felt a part of me floating up
to the ceiling. That part was looking down on my physical body and
watching the doctor talking to me; a nurse came into comfort me and
then another one came in with the paperwork. Then the part of me
that floated to the ceiling disappeared and I was sitting there
facing mounds of paperwork and forms to be signed. I could not focus
on them, but the nurses were kind enough to point out where I had to
place my signature. Everything seemed to be in another dimension.
As I was leaving the office I was able to speak with my older
daughter by cell phone. She left her workplace and met me within
minutes where she hugged me and helped me calm down. I then had to
tell my husband and call my younger daughter in Virginia. A biopsy
was scheduled for approximately a week later and then a follow-up
visit for a week after that to discuss the outcome and surgical
options with my husband and me.
To add to the stress of the situation, I had to get my
professional affairs in order. I had just started a new job and had
not yet acquired sick or vacation time. I resigned my new position,
but was fortunate enough to get a transfer to another facility with
a flexible schedule allowing me the time I needed for appointments.
The appointment my husband and I had with the surgeon was
traumatic. She explained that it was a lobular carcinoma and was
massive throughout my left breast. A lumpectomy was not really an
option. A mastectomy of my left breast needed to be performed. My
husband, the surgeon and I all stood with our arms around each other
while my husband and I cried. And then came the flurry of activity:
More paperwork, appointment scheduling and a variety of pre-op
tests. It was like a whirlwind of stress upon stress. I cried at
least once every day and finally allowed my family physician to
prescribe an anti-anxiety agent for my husband and me.
My surgery date was set for December 17, 2002. Then in January
2003, I went for my post-op visit. Good news and not so good - the
cancer had not spread to my lymph nodes (six nodes had been removed
and all were negative). But, there were still cancer cells in the
upper layers of the skin. I would have to undergo both chemotherapy
and radiation. More stress and more tears. Chemotherapy began at the
end of January 2003. The dosing schedule of the Adriamycin and
Cytoxan was every three weeks for twelve weeks. I lost my hair and
my eyebrows, had some dizzy spells, mouth sores, fatigue, nausea and
body aches.
Finally, chemotherapy was finished. I knew I needed some help in
my overall appearance. I went to the Look Good Feel Better program
at The Wellness Community-Delaware in Dover. What a morale booster!
I had completed one milestone, but I knew that I had to move on to
the next phase.
In May, I began radiation treatments, 5 days a week for a
schedule of 28 days. My skin became dry, red and irritated; it
itched quite a bit, but the creams alleviated much of the
discomfort. Then on June 12, 2003, radiation was finished. Another
milestone on the road to recovery!
In July, I had surgery to complete the implant procedure. Working
with a physical therapist and pain management specialist helped me
through the discomfort. I also began attending Yoga classes at the
Wellness Community.
I am now feeling much better and my energy level has increased.
The pain and stress have been reduced and I feel more in control of
my life again. I am working part-time, staying involved with the
yoga classes and volunteering with Reach to Recovery. I belong to
two professional organizations and am the newly-elected president of
the Ladies Auxiliary of my local fire company. I was honored by my
fellow pharmacists by the Bowl of Hygeia Award for 2004. These too,
are milestones on my path.
I hope I can help people whose lives have been impacted by
cancer, because I know that I have been blessed. Here are some
lessons I have learned from my path:
- It is important to seek all avenues for your overall recovery.
The medical community and The Wellness Community have been
wonderful resources for me.
- Friends, family, and faith are vital forces in the recovery
process.
- Yesterday cannot be changed, tomorrow is unknown, but today is
a precious gift to treasure. Fill it with life and hope; share it
with others.
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